The basis of a good and healthy relationship is open communication, and this is especially true when it comes to discussing sexual health. It is important to address this sensitive matter since doing so provides trust, safety, and mutual understanding, despite the fact that it may feel daunting or embarrassing. The following is a guide that will help you approach this significant topic with ease and faith.
Determine the Appropriate Time & Location
Timing is vitally important. Pick a time when you and your partner are both calm and able to give the topic your undivided attention. An intimate setting that is quiet and private, such as a warm evening spent at home, will ensure that both of you are comfortable.
During an argument or when you are feeling very passionate, you should avoid beginning this conversation. Reframe it as a component of the process of establishing a more robust connection:
Due to the fact that I have been contemplating how highly I regard our partnership, I would like to make certain that we are both protected and that we are on the identical page regarding our sexual wellness.
Educate Yourself Ahead of others
It is important that you have a solid understanding of sexual health before you bring up the subject. Educate yourself on topics such as testing for sexually transmitted infections (STIs), safe sexual practices, and contraception. In this manner, you will experience a sense of self-assurance and be ready to respond to queries or address concerns.
An excellent place to begin is the sexually transmitted infection (STI) information website of the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), which provides information that is both current and trustworthy.
Make use of “I” Statements to Lessen Defensiveness
Focus on your feelings and your goals when you are having a conversation about sensitive topics. Just one example:
In place of the question “Have you been tested?”
I believe that it is essential for both of us to maintain our health. I would feel more at ease if we both went through the testing process.
..you could say.
This method demonstrates that the discourse is not about assigning blame or harboring suspicion, but rather about caring for one another.
Bring the Conversation Back to Normal
Always keep in mind that conversations about sexual health are just as important as conversations about physical or mental health. In order to help normalize the topic, sharing your personal experiences can be helpful. Take, for example:
A fellow friend of mine was quite anxious about discussing this matter with her partner; yet, once they had the opportunity to discuss it, it brought them closer together. They both took the test, and the knowledge that they were watching out for each other made them feel a great deal closer to one another.
Through the use of personal experiences such as these, tension can be alleviated and the conversation can feel less clinical.
Be Truthful About Your Emotions
I would appreciate it if you could provide your personal sexual health history, including any previous STI tests, immunizations (such as HPV), or concerns.
If you are honest with your partner, they will be more likely to return your trust.
It is important to be transparent when beginning a new relationship since it establishes a tone of openness from the very beginning.
Suggest that Both be Tested Together
Instead of being a source of concern, getting tested for sexually transmitted infections (STIs) can be a bonding experience. Make it a commitment that everyone is on board with:
What if we were put through the exam together? It would be an excellent way to put our health first and maintain a sense of self-assurance as we move forward.
Planned Parenthood’s health center locator can provide you with a list of testing locations that are located in close proximity to you.
Find Suitable Resources
At times, having a resource that is not affiliated with the discourse might be helpful in guiding it. This book, The Guide to Getting It On by Paul Joannides comes highly recommended. This book is not just amusing but also approachable and instructive.
Remain Patient & Treat Boundaries with Respect
It is perfectly acceptable for your partner to indicate that they are not yet prepared to discuss everything right away. Show respect for their speed, and if necessary, return to the subject at a later time. An continual conversation, as opposed to a one-time conversation, is the objective here.
Remarks to Conclude
Having a conversation about sexual health does not have to be an awkward experience. With the appropriate strategy, it has the potential to be a significant step toward a relationship that is healthier and more trustworthy. It is important to keep in mind that the amount of work you put into these conversations is a reflection of the care and respect you have for one another.
